Bad Boss

Gordon Tredgold, Author at How to Be a Bad Boss – Page 2 of 4

A great boss shouldn’t be afraid of showing his greatness, it’s a sign of who we are, what we are made of and why people should be following us.

You might here people saying that as leaders we need to be humble, or even worse modest, but to me that’s just  rubbish.

Whenever i hear that garbage I always remember what Churchill said about Clement Attlee ‘”Mr. Attlee is a very modest man. Indeed he has a lot to be modest about.”

When I see someone who is being modest I know that that person never really achieved anything worthwhile or memorable, i mean lets face it, it’s human nature to want to  show what we have achieved.

So if you look modest or humble then guys like me are just going to show what we can do and we all just step right over you on the way to the top.

People like winners, they want to follow winners. When was the last time a team that won a Superbowl or World Cup kept quiet about it? That’s right the 1st of Never.

If you do a good job shout about it from the roof tops, let everyone know, otherwise they will just assume your another schmuck.

It’s a dog eat do world and we need to stand out from the crowd and you don’t do that by keeping quiet.

I’m a big fan of blowing my own trumpet, but i’m an even bigger fan of getting others to blow my trumpet for me.

Thats when you can really be modest, when other are singing your praises, then you can act all kinda coy, but in reality the message is out your a winner!

Over the past 3 years I have been nominated and selected in the top 3 CEOs in USA, in the Journal of CEOs, and I even have the plaques on my office wall.

I get commented on my success and people wish that i will get to win it some day.

What they don’t know is that I actually set up and own that journal, I created as a kind of self publicity magazine . That’s why I never win it, much better to be 2nd or 3rd looks  less suspicious that way 🙂

I often get articles written about the successes I have had, sometimes my picture on the front cover, at least once a year, and I include lots of articles from other great leaders, but usually doing stuff a little bit less spectacular than I am.

Let’s face it if they want that kinda coverage they can create their own magazines 🙂

As I said, I’m a big fan of getting others to blow your trumpet, because when you get that then you can fake the modesty you like  🙂
Disclaimer: How to Be Bad Boss, is meant to be humorous and shouldn’t be taken seriously.

Many people say that it’s not a good idea to be a yes man, but I have a different thought on this.

Do you really think your boss appreciates it when you disagree with him?

Of course not!

No Boss really wants people disagreeing with him, telling him that he’s wrong, or even worse, proving to him that he’s wrong.

This is a real no no and in short: career suicide. It’s career suicide for a couple of reasons.

  1. If he is wrong, it’s best not to say anything, because if he has really screwed up, the result might lead to a leadership position opening up; and
  2. If he’s right, by some fluke, you disagreeing with him is just going to make you look like an idiot as well piss him off, and potentially limit your career.

So all in all, the safest and best option is to always agree with your boss no matter what! And who knows, the idiot may even turn out to be right. You know what they say, “Even a blind squirrel finds a nut some day”.

However, when it comes to my team, it’s truly different, they rarely ever disagree with me.

Especially not in public, as often this results in me shouting at them and correcting them,  which basically just makes them look stupid, so they know to toe the line.

Also, Yes Men always go much further in my organisation, as I know I can rely on them to do what I need without nitpicking all the time.

Why would I promote someone who constantly challenges everything I do and say, and needs to be repeatedly corrected.

Not going to happen, my time is way too short.

It’s so much easier and quicker to promote people who just know instinctively what’s right, and more importantly who’s right. 🙂

However, there are times when I do encourage a difference of opinion from my teams, but usually this is just so I can make an example of someone and have a bit of fun.

It’s a great way of teaching the new members of the team what’s expected of them. Plus I always love that look of surprise on their face when they realise just how wrong they are.

Yes Man Trailer…

Reference: Warner Brothers YES MAN starring Jim Carrey.

Disclaimer: Bad Boss is meant for amusement and the advice or recommendations should not be taken seriously. Learn about the trouble with being a Yes Man from Gordon Tredgold at the link below:

When it comes to workplace Diversity, I was never a big fan nor believer, until recently.

I have always thought that there are some groups of people who are just better at getting things done than others, and fortunately, I am a member of that group, which is white anglo-saxon males.

Whenever I wanted to get anything done, I always looked to one of my fellow brethren if I wanted to be sure that the job got done properly. There are so many advantages to this, we speak the same languages so we can clearly understand each other, we both have the same expectations of whats needed, and to be honest I would probably be happier going out for a celebratory beer with them once the job is done.

However. all that changed when my good buddy Dave pointed out that, due to our lack of diversity, we had very few women in our office, which meant the single guys either had to chat up the secretaries – no thank you, or try to hit it off with a colleagues wife at the christmas do, which to be honest isn’t a good move.

Also if we brought our own dates to the office party there was always a chance one of the senior managers might move in, you know how chicks are suckers for men in power. So by introducing more diversity, this would allow us to recruit more women into the company which would really give us single guys, or those married guys who liked to play around, some options right in our own office.

If you interview a good looking babe who doesn’t quite have the skills, you can hire her and just label it under affirmative action, nobody is ever going to question that. So now I have a completely different view of diversity, I see that there can be many advantages, and I have shared this with many of my white anglo saxon males colleagues, and guess what, we’re all in agreement.

But hey, who didn’t see that coming 🙂

Disclaimer: Bad Boss is meant to be humorous and should not be taken seriously. Diversity is an important topic and should look to include people of all sexes, races and culture. And Diversity should definitely not be used as a source of date material for an all male office.

To learn the importance of building a diverse organization, please see the articles below:

Diversity in the Workplace: Take ONE…

There’s a well known saying  ‘An ounce of image is worth a pound of performance’  which basically means, we would be much wiser spending our time on our image to appear successful than working hard.

As there are 16 ounces in a pound, then the general opinion is that by focusing more on our image, then we will be over 10 times more successful than people who focus on results.

Given that success from hard work is never guaranteed, then this is a no brainer, creating a good image is less work and has a higher probability of Success.

So what should your image be:

  • Look successful
    Flashy car, flashy suit, it sounds a cliche, but that’s because it is. Successful people always show the tappings of success: Armani Suit, Porsche, Rolex, etc. If you have all these, then you must be successful. If you can’t afford a Porsche, you can always hire one for the day. Make sure everyone sees it and also make a big deal of it. Then tell people that there is a problem, and you can’t believe the loaner they have given you. Also ensure that you have lots of Porsche Car magazines in your office too, as this will confirm you as a Porsche driver.
  • Look busy
    Always be in a hurry. This is a clear sign of someone who is Successful. If people try to stop you and speak to you, tell them, “Sorry, I’m late for an important meeting”. Always carry lots of papers, and always always be seen taking lots of work home – you don’t need to do any at home, but we’re talking image here.
  • Appear to be in demand
    Successful people are always in demand. So, ensure that your calendar is always full, and encourage suppliers and partners to call requesting your time. Remember you don’t need to go. You just need to appear to be in demand.
  • Be seen with other successful people
    Successful people only ever mix with other successful people. So, the more successful people you can be seen with, the more successful people will think you are. At company functions, only spend time with the senior managers, especially the most senior person there. Also, if you can get your photo taken with a famous celebrity, then make sure this is prominently displayed in your office. We don’t recommend you photoshopping yourself into pictures with say Tom Brady or Barack Obama, not unless it can be done tastefully and well.
  • Show your credentials
    Have your credentials displayed on your wall. If you don’t have a degree, or have a poor degree, then there are plenty of Papermill Universities who will provide certificates for less than $50. If you do create a fake degree, make sure it’s in a subject that you will not need to use so as to not get found out.  For example, I have a PhD in Molecular Biology, but as I work in IT there is no chance anyone will ask me questions on this, but they will still be impressed. If you have any sports trophies you have won, have them on display too. You can always buy trophies and then claim to have picked up an injury which is why you never play anymore.
  • Have a good looking wife/girlfriend
    A sure sign of success is to have a good looking wife or girlfriend; the more glamourous, then the more successful you will appear. If your partner isn’t good looking, then we suggest you dump her. Unless she is incredibly rich, otherwise she is holding your career back. If you’re single, then find a photo of a beautiful woman, and put this on your desk, claiming that this is your ex. Not only will this send the message out that you’re successful, but it will also signal to other good looking women that you’re a catch and will increase your chances of snagging them.

Remember it’s all about image, appearing to be successful, not actually being successful.

The more of our suggestions you can follow, the more successful you will appear, and don’t forget people are gullible and believe what they see.

If you do this it will lead to you being offered better jobs, higher salaries, etc,  and the rewards associated with being successful.

Disclaimer: How to Be a Bad Boss is meant to be humorous. This article, is aiming to show the shallowness of people who focus purely on image, which we do not recommend. According to Forbes, a leader’s image has a direct correlation to their leadership abilities. Learn more about this subject at the links below:

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